You’ve been considering divorce as an option for a while, but you haven’t told your spouse. You aren’t sure if you want to violate the contract you made to your spouse, but in many ways, you don’t see another option.
Before you talk to your spouse, there are a few questions you can ask yourself. If you answer these questions and think your marriage can be saved, that’s wonderful. If not, then you know the next steps to take.
1. Why do you want a divorce?
This is a major question, but it’s one that many people don’t ask themselves enough. What is the true reason you want to get a divorce? Did you meet someone else? Did you fall out of love with your spouse? Are financial issues or an inability to communicate a problem in your marriage? Some of these issues are resolvable, while others signal the end. It’s up to you to decide if the reason you want to divorce is really good enough to end your marriage.
2. What would make you happy?
Think about what would make you happy. Do you see a future with no spouse and no one to hold you back? Do you see yourself with your spouse after a period of time apart? Think about what divorce really means. It is unlikely you’ll remain close following a divorce, even though it’s possible. If you’re just bored or need a change, a divorce might not be the solution.
3. Are you ready for a divorce?
Divorces are more than a separation of two people. You need to get together dozens of documents and have the financial support to file. Some divorces cost thousands of dollars. Before you speak to your spouse, consider talking to an attorney about the costs and what you need. It’s easier to collect information about your marriage while it’s still in one piece.