There are many difficult aspects to divorce. The decision to separate is not an easy one for any couple. When children are involved, things get infinitely more complicated. While many suggest that divorce can result in difficulties to family life, one dad finds a bright side to separation.
As previous posts have discussed, determining child custody can be a troubling process for parents. If the separating couple does not agree on a schedule of custody time generally, a court will issue a decision for them. But, once the decision is made, what happens to the family and the children particularly is very much up to the parents.
For one dad, the experience of divorce, while trying, brought him closer to his two children and made him the father he may never have been had separation not occurred.
According to the dad, post-divorce, he was a workaholic and avid drinker, whose priorities to his children ranked somewhere near the middle to bottom of the list. After the divorce, he followed his ex-wife and his kids to another state in order to be near them. He arranged his new residence to accommodate his children. His first night alone with them, he found himself feeding a bottle to his son and feeling at home for the first time.
Since then, he has experienced the growth and life of these children. They are now in high-school and college. While divorce was a difficult process for this man and the adjustment period was a troubling experience, a relationship resulted that may never had occurred had an unhappy marriage continued.
For many couples the first step to moving on is making child custody decisions. With the right help, couples can come to an agreement that works for their family.
Source: The New York Times, "When a Divorce Makes a Better Dad," Thomas Matlack, Jan. 30, 2013